“A Facebook post saved my life”. That’s the stark message from gambling addict Mark, who has finally kicked the habit thanks to help from the NHS’s East Midlands Gambling Harms Service.
Mark had struggled with his gambling for years and knew the problem was getting out of hand but didn’t know how to seek help.
“I saw a Facebook post by the East Midlands Gambling Harms Service at the beginning of this year and thought, no, I’m not ready to talk to anyone. But then on February 1, another popped up. I was feeling really terrible about myself and I thought, it’s time. Just do it.”
Five months later, Mark credits that post with saving his life after years of gambling and what he describes as self-destruction.
“I started gambling when I was a child in seaside arcades,” he remembers. “It was the slots that really did it for me. I would go away with my mum to Skegness and it was just something you did as a child when I was growing up; you went to the arcades.”
By the time he was 14 or 15, he was spending hours in a local café putting coin after coin into the fruit machines.
“It got worse when the £500 jackpot prize machines were introduced,” said Mark. “When the jackpot prize was £100, I would go to the pub and put £200 in to win the £100. I knew I was losing money but it never fazed me.”
For those who have never struggled with addiction, to hear Mark’s words that losing the money didn’t bother him can be shocking.
“There is literally no reasoning when you are standing there at the machines,” he explained. “It doesn’t matter if it’s £5 or £1,000, in your head it’s exactly the same – it’s just money.
“And it was always slots for me. I was not one for casinos or the bookies, or the apps. It had to be the physical thing of standing in front of it, putting my money in.”
The top prize machines soon crept from a £500 jackpot to an £800 jackpot, and with that increase, the amount of money Mark was putting in also crept up. With a high-pressured, well-paid job, he admits he was using his gambling as a stress reliever and also as a way to pass the time as he travelled around the country.
But he said: “I used to love going to Ireland because I couldn’t gamble there. Their laws are different.”
One weekend, Mark’s wife joined him in Newcastle for the weekend and he said he managed to avoid gambling while she was with him. “As soon as she got on the train to go home, I spent £400. I was making large withdrawals from the joint account but I lied about where it was going.
“The next day I realised I was in self-destruct mode and that was when I saw that Facebook post.”
Days after his initial call with the service, Mark broke down in front of his wife and told her everything.
“I never realised what the service was all about, but I had a call from one of the psychologists who asked me questions about my life and my past. It was quite raw and difficult, but I was then referred for cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) which was absolutely brilliant. It really made me think about why I gambled, what my triggers were and how to find ways to stop myself.”
Some of Mark’s methods to keep him away from the temptation of gambling include stopping his access to cash. “It was always all about cash in slot machines, so now I only have Apple Pay and my wife checks the bank constantly.
“When I’m away now, instead of using the fruit machines, I watch YouTube videos and food reviews. I can’t ever say I’ll never get the urge to gamble again and it’s a scary thought that I am never going to do it again because at times it was fun and enjoyable. But unfortunately I am a gambling addict and there’s nothing I can do about that. I am learning to live without it in my life.”
The East Midlands Gambling Harms Service offers specialist treatment and support to people struggling with problem gambling across Derbyshire, Leicestershire, Lincolnshire, Northamptonshire, Nottinghamshire and Rutland.
The team is made up of psychologists, therapists, mental health practitioners and psychiatrists, along with ‘experts by experience’ – people who have recovered from a gambling addiction themselves.
The service is run by Derbyshire Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust and more information can be found at www.eastmidlandsgambling.nhs.uk or by calling 0300 013 2330.